Take My Life
by Jezzvamp
Summary: Alice's life has slowly spun out of control for the past couple of years, it's a hole she just cant find a way out of. She abandoned the comfortable life she knew to protect her brother, and pushed away her only true friend, Jasper. M for some language
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: i do not own twilight or any of the characters affiliated with the story **_

_**P.S. this is my first story so please be kind if you review and please do :)**_

_Alice_

_6-12-__2008_

'Shut the fuck up! You don't know shit so why don't you just go fuck your self Mike! Yea that's right, walk away you cowards!' Alice yelled at the guys from her class as she helped her brother out of the bushes. 'Come on babe. It's ok, I'm here now, it's ok.' She gathered both their bags and headed to the bus station. 'Ouch' she cringed as he pulled on her hair 'no, Ben,' she spoke softly but firmly to him 'that hurts remember. You can't do that. What do you want? Use your words'

'My Hat Ali, I need my hat.' He spoke in his deep yet childish voice. The bullying made him nervous and frightened so his speech always declined after another episode. They didn't happen so much these days. Every one had either gotten used to him or Alice's threats and out bursts had finally driven them away. But there were always the idiots that got full of them selves and took advantage of her absence.

'Yea mate I'll get it.' she sighed as she crawled into the bush to look for his hat.

'Hey Ben how are you?' the voice didn't wait for a reply 'Where's Alice?'

'Right here, Bella' Alice called out as she crawled back out, hat in hand. 'God I could kill Mike' she ranted.

'Not again. What is it with him? You ever think it's because he wants the reaction out f you?'

'No, or else he would do it when I was around, or fight me.' Bella gave her the eyebrow 'verbally I meant' Alice corrected her self. 'No it's just because he's a dick' 'Come on Ben let's go before we miss the bus. See you later Bella.'

'See ya. Bye Ben.'

'Bye. Come on Ali the bus, the bus Ali.'

* * *

'Aaaaaaaaaaaa-lllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice…Aaaaaaaaaaaa-lllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice…' the back of the bus chanted as she got on. She could never figure out why they did this other then to stir her up. But they'd been doing it for over a year now and still they weren't tired of it. They sat down in their usual seat as she pulled out her ipod. Music, loud music, was her one escape from the world, and she escaped as often as possible.

_For the love of God will it never end_, Alice thought as she felt her brother tap her on the shoulder. He had learnt from a young age not to interrupt her music unless it was important. And the only thing he considered important was being picked on. 'WHY!' she yelled as she turned around and took out her head phones. It was a girl from the grade below her, a usual suspect. 'Just leave him alone! He's not hurting any one!' she could see now that they'd been throwing bits of paper at him. 'Wow paper. That's real inventive.' She mocked them as she reached into her bag. The bus went quiet for a moment before it irrupted into noise and the driver pulled the bus over.

'Fuck that bitch threw a book at me!' the girl screamed as she held her forehead. Alice wasn't surprised she hadn't missed, -before Mabel high she'd been a real jock her self - but just that the text book held its course. But awe turned to worry as she saw the trickle of blood escape between her fingers. _Fuck _she thought as the girls' boyfriend came at her from one end of the bus and the driver from the other. The students tried to clear the way for the two.

'That's it!' the driver yelled as he grabbed her bag 'all of you off the bus! All of you, you hear!' she got hold of Ben who was looking shocked more than anything because he didn't quite understand the situation.

The driver pushed her off the last step and she fumbled, Ben helped her up. 'I said all of you!' he yelled to the rest of the bus.

'What!'

'Why?'

'We didn't do anything!' the bus complained, but they all got off.

Alice tried to hurry Ben away from the mob and the angry boyfriend. Why did she get her self into situations she couldn't handle? But there was no way she could avoid this.

'Wait up slut!'

'Fuck off, it's your girl whose the slut around here' _that's right antagonise him. _She thought sarcastically to her self. 'Run home Ben. Now!' she whispered as she tried to push him away. She could tell that they were almost home. He would know the way from here. They were at the park he used to love. But he just stood staring at her in confusion. 'Run Ben! It's a race ok? Go!' and with that they started running. She let him get ahead of her so that she could act as a blockade from the mob. When they got to the corner and her house was in sight she stopped to turn around. Both her and Ben were fast runners but knew that he would run out of stamina soon, so she turned to face the not so far away boyfriend.

He charged up and tackled her to the ground. She managed to knee him in the gut and squirm out from under him, but a fat girl was close behind her and got a handful of hair as he got up off the ground. She elbowed the fat girl in the stomach hard as the guy got hold of her shirt and threw her back onto the dirt. He held her down and yelled right in her face 'You Fucking whore! If you touch my girl again-' but he didn't get to finish before he was thrown off her.

'What kind of an arsehole are you? And all of you' the rescuer glared at the gathered crowed 'ganging up on a chick like this! Cowards!' he cussed, but made it sound like the worst word in the English language. He bent down to help her up.

'Yea well it's all her retard brothers' fault!'

'That's it!' she screamed and escaped his hold. She threw her self at the boyfriend and knocked him down. She only got one punch in before he layed a good hit right on her jaw, splitting her lip open, letting her taste her own blood. This threw her off balance, the rescuer grabbed her round the waist and started to pull her away, kicking and screaming and yelling profanities back at the crowd.

'Get off me Jasper!' Alice hissed, when she calmed down a bit. They were almost at her house; Jasper was her neighbour.

'So that's what your mother was talking about' he said as he let go of his hold on her.

'You don't know anything... And neither does she!' she spat as she said this. It was coloured red which brought with it the pain from the blow.

'Fine then.' She could see the hurt in his eyes as he turned away from her.

'No Jasper, wait, I'm sorry. Thanks for that. Just now. I mean…not only for just now but…'

'Just go inside Alice, and clean yourself up.' There was little compassion in his voice, and she could understand only too much why. Then he left her at her mailbox. Alone. _As usual._ She thought.


	2. Chapter 2

_Jasper_

_8-5-2006 _

'Hey, Mrs. Brandon what's up? What's going on?'

'Oh Jasper!' Mrs. Brandon wailed, 'I can't take it any more. That girl! Why must she do this to me? I swear Jasper she does it on purpose! Just to spite me. I've always been such a good mother, I've tried my best but that's just not good enough for her!'

'Don't listen to her lies Jasper.' the soft voice floated down the stairs.

'Alice.' she never noticed the way he made her name sound like a caress, and he was glad of it. But he just couldn't help doing it. 'What's happened?' he could see that she'd been crying, not a common sight with Alice Brandon.

'It's Ben. He came home with a black eye.' Her voice caught in her throat on the last words. She was fighting back tears. Jasper left Mrs. Brandon still crying and mumbling to herself at the kitchen table, brandy glass empty in her hand. This unfortunately was not an uncommon sight.

He followed her up the stairs and into her room. The third surprise was when he closed the door and turned around she hugged him. She held onto the back of his shirt and cried into it. At 16 he was almost two heads taller then her tiny frame, so he laid his head on top of hers' and breathed in her smell. He knew this was not the time to be thinking of her like this, but only once before had they been this close, almost a year ago when their father left. He felt her tears stop and her breathing even out. He pulled back her head to look at her red swollen eyes. 'Tell me what happened' he whispered.

She took a breath before she started. 'Well I got called up to the office at lunch, they said my mum was on the phone.' Another breath 'she told me that she had gotten a call from Ben's school saying to come and get him, because he'd been fighting.' Jasper just looked at her confused. But she continued. 'But she couldn't leave work so could I go get him, with both schools permission. Both principals agreed to it, knowing full well that I might as well be his mother, not his sister.' 'When I get to his school he's sitting in the office with an ice pack over his eye. When I took a look at it, it had already swelled up, it was red and his brow had been slit. I wanted to throw up Jasper. Who would do that?' again she tried to fight back the tears. He had no words of comfort, this wasn't his world, and he didn't know how to handle it. He wasn't as strong as her, but he could be strong for her. He pulled her close as they sat on the bed; the tears didn't come but she didn't pull away either, just continued with her story. 'When they told me that the other guy was provoked, that it was an accident, self defense, I knew who it was and I was going to murder him. They were going to suspended Ben for starting the fight. So I simply told that _principal_ what I thought of him and his school and brought Ben home.'

Jasper just looked at her; there was more to this story. 'Alice.' he said her name sternly, 'what did you do?'

'I didn't touch him.'

'What did you do? After you brought Ben home, tell me!'

'Jasper, if I don't tell you, I won't have to lie'

'Oh dear God. Ali-'

'Just leave it ok, I took care of my brother, something no one else is willing to do.' Jasper got up to leave shaking his head in disappointment, he knew she could see it clearly painted on his face; because hers met it with shame. She knew how much he hated it when she was violent. 'Jasper don't leave me!' even if her voice wasn't saturated in desperation he would have stayed anyway. 'Ok I'll tell you. But you won't like it, please don't hate me.'

'I could never hate you-'

'I destroyed his car, then he tripped and broke his nose all on his own, I swear I didn't touch him!' she yelled in a rushed barely understandable way.

'Wait, you destroyed his car?!' she looked down and played with the seam of the bed-spread.

'Ok so maybe destroyed is the wrong word, I just fixed it so that it would never run again without a new engine installed.' She said sheepishly with a hit of pride though.

'Why don't you ever use your powers for good?' He sighed. 'And how did he just happen to trip then?'

She just looked down, refusing to make eye contact. 'He just tripped. And that's it.'

'Fine then' as he got up to leave he turned back to look at the defiant 15 yr old 'When will you grow up already.' He closed the door on her and headed down the stairs, hearing her yelling at him through the wood,

'Grow up! Grow up! I'll give you grow up! I'm 15! I've seen and done things no 15 yr old should ever have to do. Why if I-' he got out of hearing distance just as her threats were starting, her voice was just a muffled high pitch sound.

Downstairs Mrs. Brandon had calmed down and was just staring into her crystal pitcher, turning it around in slow circles.

'You know the worst thing about all of this is', she nodded with her head at the stairs 'I honestly don't know who that girl is anymore. It's just some evil yelling creature, who doesn't understand me or even try to. You know my life is just as hard, she's nothing special.' Jasper just stared at her in shock.

'Mrs. Brandon, no offense but I think you should try to cut the girl some slack, she's damn tough but could use her mother right about now to comfort her.'

'Oh Jasper you don't even know the half of it,' she finally looked up at him, 'She wants to throw away her scholarship, take Ben and put them both in the local co-ed school. The one thing she had going for her, the one thing that didn't make her completely useless.'

'Ahh Mrs.-'

'You can leave now thank you Jasper.'


	3. Chapter 3

_Alice_

_6__-12-2008_

'I don't want to hear about it!' Alice yelled as she walked straight past her mother and brother standing just inside the door way.

'Well I'm tired of having to repeat myself to you Alice!' Her mother yelled back at her,

'Then stop saying it. Just quit pretending that you give a shit about either of us and just go back to your bottle of vodka. I preferred it when you were sullen and just sat in a dark room all day!'

'That's it Alice I cant take you any more. If you think life is so bad here then just leave. Just go live with your father then!'

'What, do you think I haven't tried? And even if I could leave I wouldn't leave Ben here with you, I'd have to die before I let that happen!'

'Just get out of my sight; I don't won't to see that face of yours any more.'

'Gladly!' she stormed up stairs to her room and turned her stereo up as loud as it could go. She would have locked her door if it hadn't been ripped out last week because her mother thought she was doing drugs. 'Wish I was doing drugs!' she screamed, knowing that no one could hear her, but she just liked to let it out any way.

'Alice?' she saw Ben mouth at the doorway. She turned down that music so she could hear him.

'Yes Ben?' she sighed trying not to take her anger out on him, 'Well what is it?'

'Ah mum said, she said, to, to turn the music.'

'Up?'

'Ah no, mum said down, down Alice.'

'So say it! she told you to tell me to turn the music _down_.' She took in a breath to calm her self. She fished her ipod out of her back pack, 'Well you can tell her, no.' she turned the music up as loud as it could go, making Ben cover his ears and run away, before popping out her fly screen and shimmying off the roof and down a tree.

* * *

'Hey haven't seen you around here lately. What no cops chasing you? I'm disappointed'

'Nah Erick, worse, my mother.'

'Ah true. Well on that note , come inside, quick.' Erick scanned the street dramatically before slowly closing the door behind him.

Alice had always liked Erick, he was fun, relaxed and almost always stoned. They met at a party 3 years ago, when her life started to go to shit. He was the older brother supposedly supervising it. Alice had gotten bored of the party inside so ventured out into the mysterious shed out back where Erick and his mates were getting high. They thought she was cool so let her join in. He was 18 when they first met. Since then he had been a safe house, and when she and Jasper fell apart he was the only one she had left to turn to. That and he had the magical cure back then. Pot.

'So what can I do you for today miss?'

'Can I just bum around here for a while? It's the only place she can't get me.'

'Sure can babe.'

'You seem with it today, well reasonably. Got a girly do we now?'

'Nah you no you're the only chick for me!' he laughed.

'I wouldn't go out saying that in public dude.'

'True, true. Ok yes there is a girl actually. Her name's Angela, real cute sensible one, got me job at her dad's 7/11. Now I can make a proper living.'

Alice couldn't help laughing, 'Wow I never thought I'd see the day that you, the great Erick Yorkie was whipped.'

'Hey I am so not whipped, and if I am it's because I want to be. I really like her, and if this makes her happy then I'm gonna do it. Ok?'

'Sure. I'm sorry Erick; I didn't mean to be insensitive.'

'Nah its all cool, that's just who you are.'

'Oi what's that supposed to mean' she scoffed with indignation,

'Just being truthful. Admit it Ali you're a cold hearted bitch. Embrace it, love it. I do.'

Alice was insulted by the comment but knew it was true. For the past couple of years she slowly had become this person she didn't even know anymore.

'So…want some ice for that jaw? Looks like it kinda hurts.' She'd actually completely forgotten about it until he brought it up, then yeah it did hurt. She nodded so he went off to get an ice pack that he had brought for such occasions. 'Wanna talk about it?'

'Not really. Oh but I saw Jasper. Well he kinda saw me; I suppose that's why I'm still alive.'

'Oh, you mean he saw that.' Indicating to her jaw

'Yeah and I doubt it did anything to heal our relationship.'

'Were you rude?'

She thought about it, and as much as she wanted to say no, she knew that she was. It was hard for her not to be these days.

'Ok maybe a little, but I tried to fix it.' she thought this was true.

'I'm sorry babe, but I just think two years of silence can't ever be patched up. I know you tried to fix it a long ago, but he doesn't-'

'He doesn't care.' She finished for him. 'Not any more. No one does.'

'Now hold up a sec, don't go all depressed like that. I hate it when depressed Alice comes out.'

She nodded at him no longer really listening. 'Hey thanks for listening. But I'm gonna head off now. See ya' round ok?' He waved her off, worrying where she was headed.

_He just doesn't love you anymore. _

_Nobody does. _

_The sooner you understand that the quicker you can accept it and move on with your pathetic little life. _

* * *

**Hi, im so sorry for all the screw ups in the first two chapters. i hope i fixed them all. but if u eva find more dnt hesitate to tell n and ill change them ASAP. **

**plz review n tell me wat u think or if u got any suggestions u want added into the story. ta. - jezzvamp :D  
**


	4. Chapter 4

_Alice_

_17-12-2005_

'I just don't wan't to have to struggle anymore! You all make it too hard! You're a fucking alcoholic, my son is hardly a boy I could be proud of, well at least Alice isn't a complete failure' his yelling had grown louder and louder. It was late, well past any respectable hour when the yelling started, Ben ran into Alice's room crying; he had never liked it when their parents fought, and Alice especially didn't like this one. It was the first night she had found her escape route out of her bedroom.

'Shh Ben, just stay in here and don't make a sound. It's like a secret pirate hide-away ok?' she had made him a bed with lots of pillows and blankets in her wardrobe. It would block out a lot of sound and hopefully he would fall back to sleep.

He nodded to her with a small, excited but still nervous smile on his face. She closed the door and undid the screen on the window.

**ok, so this is a real short chapter but its just kind of a memory of Alice's. there will prob b a few of them popped in here and there. if u really have something against them let me no.**

**PS i hope ur keeping tabs on the date at the start of each chapter  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer! i do not own anything or anyone affiliated with twilight **

**p.s. this chapter is really crap, just go with it**

* * *

Jasper

_6__-12-2008_

'Why do I even try? No scratch that why do I even care?' Jasper grumbled to himself as walked past the lounge up to his bedroom.

'What was that honey?'

'Nothing mum!' he called out to his mum sitting in her arm chair consumed by a cross-stitch.

'Oh and Maria's out by the pool waiting for you!' she called out as an after thought. Jasper rolled his eyes and backtracked away from the stairs to head out back to the pool, where his stalker awaited him. Maria wasn't really that bad actually. She just had a habit of _always _being around, especially when he really didn't want to talk, made worse by that fact that she could make him say so much.

Jasper stepped out onto the patio and saw her lying on a lounge chair smoking what looked to him a cigar. He shook his head in unsurprised amazement as he headed over to her.

'God you look like someone just ate your dog! What's up?' she barley even looked up at him, enjoying her sun bathing too much.

'What? I don't even own a dog.'

'I know. I was just creating a new figure of speech... oh god, never mind. So what's up?'

'You said that like your always having to listen to my problems'

'Well I am aren't I?'

'No. Nothings wrong, I'm fine'. She just raised her eyebrow in disbelief.

'Dude I know. I saw on my way here. Why else would I be here?'

'Because my mum treats you like a queen when ever you come over here.' He said trying to distract her from her original statement.

'Fuck off. I am a queen. But we're not talking about me. We were talking about you and Alice.' She smiled at him slyly knowing that he was trying to distract her with his comment.

'Fine I'll bite. How did you see?'

'I'm not telling.' she pouted

'Then I'm not telling.'

'It didn't look good' Maria said after a moment of silence 'first time you guys have spoken in like years and…yeah, I don't think it was supposed to be like that.'

'What, no one was under the illusion that she _wasn't _an ungrateful little bitch. Especially me.'

'Look, if I pull out my psychology degree for a bit-'

'You don't have a degree'

'Yet' she continued on ignoring his interruption. 'Lets analyse her behavior for a moment'

'Must we?'

'Yes, so she never used to fight until all that shit went down that we don't need to bring up' she gave Jasper a sly smile 'she pushed every one away and turned to drugs and partying, dropped out of baseball, and her prissy little school…looks to me that she gave up on life.'

Jasper was looking a little lost. He already new every thing she was saying. So where was this heading?

'But…' he struggled for words 'she, she was getting her life on track again, it was her…she hasn't been in a fight for a while now.' _Maybe she gave up on life because every one around her had given up on her?. _Jasper thought; but what he said was:'Stop making excuses for her, would you.'

'Ok, Jasper I never told you this but…you know her mum is like crazy as hell and full on alcho rite? Well…she kind of abuses Alice, verbally, like when everything was going to shit she pretty much said it was all her fault and that no one ever loved her or ever could' . 'She still does.'

'How do you even know that?'

'My mum. Look word gets around eventually. Its not like the women is subtle or quiet or anything.' she gave him a scrutinizing glance, 'Why didn't you know that. You two used to be great friends before your falling out. So...' she said expectantly.

There was an awkward silence between them. As Jasper tried to come up with an appropriate answer. He could have lied and said he just truly didn't know. He could just play naive and unobservant but this would have sounded weak and pathetic. Neither of which he felt like being; but the truth was just as bad. He did know. He had always known, he was just surprised that others knew. He had never told anyone anything about Alice's life because she had begged him not to. Every time her mum yelled, every time she drank, every time she hit. And as ashamed as he was to admit it; he had kept his promise to her each time. Jasper repeated this all to Maria, who just looked at him with a blank stare. 'What!' he yelled after she just kept staring.

'You weren't to know. its ok.'

'Know what? What's ok?' Jasper was becoming frustrated with her. Most of the time he had trouble keeping her quiet and now he was hard pressed to get a strait answer out of her.

'My mum,' she started ' well you know how she's the school nurse, well they are putting Alice on suicide watch. They tried to have a meeting with Mrs. Brandon, but you can imagine how well that turned out.'

Jasper let this absorb for a moment.

'What do you mean suicide watch?'

'I thought you were meant to be a smart dude.' she gave an exasperated sigh. 'Look the real reason i came over today was to pass on a message from the school. It goes; could you please try to keep an eye on her and pass the message along to all her friends and family...oh wait that's right she doesn't have any! You'd think they would know that.'

Jasper had stopped listening to Maria's rant that followed. _Suicide _he thought, _but she was getting better, less fights_... And then it dawned on him, what was the reason behind this? had she given up?

'Fuck' he said out loud without realising it, then stood up and walked back into the house and out the front door.

* * *

**It makes sense to me but i dnt no bout u guys, if it doesn't tell me and ill try to fix it or just recap for u. oh and is Jasper sounding kinda lame or just acting like some one who was hurt badly by someone they trust?**

**please review! jezzvamp :D**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: do not own Twilight or any charcters, facts, cars etc. afiliated with twilight. **

_Alice_

_7-12-__2008_

Walking along the beach at one in the morning, you would think it would be pretty quiet, peaceful, and solitary. But in actual fact it's teaming with noises and activity; a druggy shooting up under the pier, the insomniacs running down by the water, the not so hidden teen couple making out in the shrubbery.

Alice used to make the hour long drive to the coast all the time, back when she first got her licence. She loved the speed when going down the highway, the sound her fathers present made when she revved the engine. Alice smiled cynically remembering her 17th birthday present waiting outside the house. The front seat of the yellow Porsche had a card from her father on it reading:

_Dear Alice,_

_I hope you can forgive me for the dreadful things I said, and I hope this will make up for my lack of presence in you life. _

_You're Father._

Because a car is exactly what every girl needs to fill the void in her life.

While reclined in the front seat sipping her coffee and listening to the ocean, Alice could almost believe that her life was peaceful, untroubled by all of its problems. Almost.

Until she heard the tell-tale signs of unpleasant company arriving. Loud male voices under the age of 30, a bottle being dropped, loud boisterous laughing and of course the wolf whistle.

Now unless there was a hot beach babe lying around at this time of night, which was doubtful, this meant they were now probably heading toward her car. Trying to make as little movement as possible, Alice reared her head up to see over the dashboard. Thank God for tinted windows, she thought as she started to recognise some of the black figures heading toward her.

'Hey!' the leader bellowed as he squinted, trying to see through the windscreen.

'I know this car!' he laughed a little,

'I know this car _very_ well. Well the back seat any way.' He winked at his friends who all laughed.

'Alice' he crooned.

In the background Alice heard one of the friends start to sing _Alice the camel has, two humps_, but she was mainly focused on the boy coming around to the drivers' side door. He tapped on the window. At this distance she knew he would be able to see right through the glass. He was looking at her. Alice let out the breath she was holding and let the window go down no further then an inch. Even through the small gap she could smell him, a mix of every spirit and beer he was able to get his hands on.

'Hello James' Alice said expressionlessly, without looking up at him. She kept her focus on his yahoo friends.

'Havn't seen u round lately sweetums.' James said through the crack of the window. Alice tried not to laugh as he tried squishing his face through the gap.

'Whats with the window. I thought we were friends Alice? Why u shunning me?'

'James we were never friends. Unless you call fuck buddies friends…I don't. So why don't you and all your little friends just back away from my car and I won't run you all over.' She finally turned to face him with an overly fake smile on her face.

He looked a little confused at first, and then he got mad.

'Look Alice, me and my friends have had a very long night and all we want is a little company. So why don't you just unlock the doors and lets all just have a little chat?'

'I have a beta idea' Alice said as she turned the key and started the engine. It let out a loud raw as she revved it, this only startled the drunken crowd for a moment.

'Do you really want us to hurt your pretty little car?' James warned.

'Not if you're looking for a law suit' a mysterious voice came from nowhere. Then a figure emerged from the bushed. A 6ft 3 inches figure, with short wavy blond hair, a gangly toned figure that Alice knew all too well. But wished she didn't.

'Who are you? Her lawyer?' James asked Jasper indignantly.

'No' was all he said then tapped lightly on the passenger side window. Alice was too stunned to do anything at first, but after he tapped a second time she reached over to unlock the door. He slid in, locked the door again and put on his seat belt.

Alice sat up promptly and did the same. The group moved out of the way now. To stunned by Jasper's presence to think like a menacing gang. How drunk are they? Alice thought.

* * *

**Hi guys, sorry this chapter was later coming up im in the middle of assessment time at uni. soooo busy atm. any hoo. hope you like and plz plz plz plz review! thanx.**

**-jezzvamp :D**


	7. Chapter 7

**disclaimer: dnt own any of it..blah blah blah. **

**ok, sorry that it has taken me a while to put this up n that its so short. uni n fashion shows have been hectic! gah! i will try to have the next chapter up sooner. **

**thanx n plz review! -jezz :D  
**

_Jasper_

_6/12/2008_

_This is ridiculous; I can't believe I'm doing this__, _Jasper thought to himself for the hundredth time since abruptly leaving Maria. He was sure she had planned it all. That he would get there and Alice would be fine and at home. He was trying to come up with an appropriate excuse for why he was ringing her door bell when the door opened. It was Ben.

'Hi mate,' Jasper said, thankful it wasn't Alice or her mother who would demand an explanation, Ben wouldn't. Ben just looked at him.

'Is Alice home Ben?' it felt strange talking to Ben after all this time. He used to feel so comfortable around the kid, the way he talked and his odd behaviour at times. Like just now. Jasper remembered that fighting, whether Ben was involved or not, made him act stranger and more drawn in on himself.

Ben continued to just stare at Jasper. Normally he would have just left, but Jasper just couldn't bring him self to leave, at least not until he was sure that everything was fine. Well as fine as it could be in this house.

Jasper looked behind Ben and all he saw was darkness, that and bottles, and stacked up dishes. The house was in a worse state then he had ever seen it. _I guess Mrs Brandon gave up on pretending _Jasper thought as he pushed past Ben.

Mrs Brandon was slumped asleep, or passed out, on an arm chair in the lounge room. It felt so surreal walking up the stairs to Alice's room. He had done this so many times he could have done it blind folded. Strange, considering how long it had actually been since he'd been there. The first thing he noticed was that the door had been harshly removed from the hinges. The second was no Alice, followed by her stereo system; her pride and joy looked like it had been attacked by a baseball bat. It had, he noticed when he saw the bat that had rolled off to the corner of the room. Then lastly, the clue he didn't really need was the fly screen had been torn off. Jasper sat on her bed in a huff of exhaustion. Her room was looking pathetically sad, like a movie set. The mirror of the wardrobe was smashed, evidence of something being thrown at it. Cracks in the plaster of the walls, rips in pillow cases and on the bedspread. Under the bed he found empty boxes of chocolate, bottles of beer, spirits and wine, some empty, a few full…and a small show box duck taped shut. Ordinarily Jasper would never have thought to look inside it, but drastic circumstances called for drastic measures.

Sadly it was what he had expected to find, but luckily nothing worse. Inside the box was about 300g of marijuana, a picture of Alice and Ben when they were about 10, a shit list (a list of names and addresses Alice planned to 'take out'). Another sheet of paper with just odd numbers on it, a few of her old swimming medals and about $2000 rolled up tightly. Her whole life could fit into a shoe box. Jasper sighed to himself as he realised he had to finally put his pride aside and man up. He had loved this girl once, that's why everything had hurt so much, but now it was time to live up to what he had said so long ago…_I will ALWAYS be there for you. No matter what. _


	8. Chapter 8

_Jasper_

_7/12/08_

Jasper could see the distinguishable yellow Porsche when he was still a bit down the street, so he parked and decided to walk the rest of the way. However, in the two or so minutes it took him to get there, a bunch of about five guys had crowded around the car. One of them in particular was a little too close for Jaspers liking.

'Look Alice, me and my friends have had a very long night n all we want is a little company. So why don't you just unlock the doors and lets all just have a little chat?' Jasper couldn't believe his ears. Had that creep actually just said that? All that stood between him and that guy was this stupid bush and Alice's car, then it would be easy to take him down. Jasper was pretty sure his friends wouldn't stick around to help. Just then Alice must have revved the engine to try n scare off the guys. She had done a lot of work on the car, it sounded really beasty and mean. Jasper shook his head. Now was not the time to congratulate her on her mechanic skills.

Just as he won the battle with the bush jasper heard the guy threaten her again, 'Do you really want us to hurt your pretty little car?'

'Not if you're looking for a law suit' Jasper said as he stepped out of the god forsaken bush. He could now see Alice's small frame through the tinted windows. And the lump of muscle staring at her predatorily. Japer's heart started to pound faster with rage.

'Who are you? Her lawyer?' the guy asked Jasper indignantly.

'No' was all Jasper could say. He was too wound up, all he wanted to do was beat this guy to a pulp, and who was he to threaten Alice. He tapped slightly on the passenger side window. Alice looked so afraid and stunned, it took her a minute to lean over and unlock the door. He slid in and locked the door again and put on his seat belt. Alice sat up promptly and did the same. The group moved out of the way now. To stunned by Jasper's presence to think like a menacing gang. _I hope that guy tries to stand in the way, I'll enjoy seeing him get run over_, Jasper thought. He didn't understand why he was suddenly feeling all of this. He wasn't naturally an aggressive guy, laid back most people would say. But for some reason, since seeing Alice yesterday afternoon, he just felt like a rubber band that was being pulled tighter and tighter. And right now it felt like he was going to snap. But why?

They had stopped a few blocks down to change sides, so now Jasper was driving, Alice didn't even put up a fight when he told her to stop the car and change over.

'Are you ok?' he managed to ask when they were half way home. She had been staring at him almost the whole time; he could feel it boring into the side of his head.

'Are you ok?' she asked back, a worried tone in her voice.

'I'm fine' he answered shortly.

'Well you don't look it. You look like your about to snap the steering wheel in half'

'Better then snapping you in half' he murmured. And now the band had snapped.

'What was that?!'

'I said!' they were now both yelling 'better then snapping you in half! Which would not only be easy but well deserved!'

'Deserved?!'

'YES!' his voice held a far more menacing tone then hers. She was soft and little, he was a tall large guy, and he instantly felt bad for screaming at her. He glanced at her for the first time. She looked pretty shaken up, weather it was from before or just now he wasn't sure. She looked a little mad as well though which eased the guilt a bit.

'I'm sorry for yelling at you'

'Why are you even here?'

'Gee Alice perhaps a thank you would be more appropriate, don't you think?'

'Why? I had the situation under control. No need to be a knight in shinning armour any more. I've survived the last two years on my own. I didn't need your help now and I didn't need it yesterday. I never needed it. I never will. Ever!' her breath was laboured she was getting upset and over worked.

'Stop the car!' she yelled. 'Stop it!' he slowed down and pulled onto the side of the highway. There were no other cars on the road, and the flickering street lights made the scene look like something out of a horror film. By the time Jasper had stopped admiring the location, Alice had already started to walk away from the car.

'And just where do you think your going?' he called out after her.

'Away from you and your good Samaritan ways!' he caught up to her and her small stride easily.

'Don't be stupid, what are you going to walk home?'

'Who said I'm going home.' She stoped and looked back at her car. 'Actually that's my car. You walk home.'

'So you're just going to leave me…again' Jasper said as if defeated.

'Again! Again! What do you know about being left behind?' She reached up to push him as she said this, but Jasper found this more funny then threatening. He fought to hold back the laugh, but she could see the smirk on his face.

'Sure laugh. Cause it's such a funny situation. Unless you're laughing in guilt because you know how perfect your life really is!'

'Yes'

'Yes what?'

'Yes my life is perfect…well compared to yours it is'

'You insensitive bastard!'

'Well what do you want me to say? If I say no I have it hard too then you'd cut off my head, if I say my life is perfect you still cut off my head! You're impossible, maybe everyone disappoints you because you have such high expectations!' Alice just stood there staring at him.

'I'll give us both a moment to forget that you ever said that, ok?'

'Thanks.' He said pathetically. 'I'm sorry'

'You have no idea how little meaning that word has to me now. The amount of times I've said it…or tried to, and all the times people have tried to use it as a way of getting out of holding responsibility for something. You should know this. I'm sure it means nothing to you too. Or is that just my thousand and one apologies you wont accept.' She looked at him expectantly, he knew she was waiting for him to say something profound. But jasper was having a hard enough time trying to say anything at all.

'Alice, I…I just,'

'Don't. Look I'll give you a lift back to your car if you want it. I'd appreciate if you didn't talk any more.' And with that she turned and left him standing under a broken street light like an idiot.


	9. Chapter 9

_Alice _

_7/12/08_

Neither Alice nor Jasper said anything the whole way back to Jasper's car. And as soon as he stepped out and closed the door she took off, almost taking him out with the back end of her car. Not that she would have cared if it had. Why she had ever felt bad for him and for what had happened she didn't know, because moments like this when he was being a complete dick she really thought he deserved it! _He was never like that before he met you_. Shut up voice. She told the annoying voice in the back of her head. She liked to think of it as her second mother. If the real one wasn't saying anything negative, the one in her head was. But for some stupid reason she always listened to them both.

'Fine!' she yelled out to no one, as she turned her car in the direction of home.

Because she had been heading in the complete opposite direction, he had beaten her back and his rusty little car was sitting unsteadily half on and off the curb. There was a chance that he would be in bed and going off to sleep right about now. But there was a higher chance that he was in the pool swimming, or sitting next to it in the dark.

Since it was almost Christmas **(southern hemisphere +December =summer remember) **he was doing slow laps up and down the pool. Alice always loved the way the muscles in his back and arms moved when he swam, so not wanting to disturb him, went and positioned her self on one of his deck chairs. It didn't take long for him to notice her and swim over to the edge.

'Yes?' he asked in a hostile tone.

'I guess neither of us break habits easily' she said ignoring his hostility but looking straight at him, something she had never been quite comfortable with. In the old days there was always such a beautiful look of devotion that always embarrassed her. Now there was just a mix of hated and hurt. This look was worse.

He continued to just stare right at her, and regrettably she had to look away.

'I'm sorry' she started, he waited for more. So she forged on.

'I'm sorry about everything. I've wanted to say it so much, and I tried pathetically many times. But I was always messed up or was too stoned to do it right. I'm not looking for sympathy or help. Or even friendship, I know that would be asking for more then what I deserve. I know I don't even deserve forgiveness, but I'm asking is for you to at least listen. You don't have to, and you can tell me to shut up and go away and I will' she stopped and waited to see if he would. When he didn't, she continued on.

'I'm sorry that I never opened up to you, and that I let my self get into the state I'm in, when time and time again you offered your shoulder. I'm sorry that I disappointed you so much and I'm sorry that you got hurt because of me and that I let it happen. I'm sorry that all I can say is I'm sorry, that word has so little meaning, and no action behind it, but that's all I know how to do. And I'm not even half decent at it. I'm sorry for the past however many years you've known me, but know I'm going to remove my self from the picture of your life so that every memory of me can be erased.' She took a breath to steady herself, 'I just ask that you don't say anything about tonight. You never saw me, or those guys. Just say that you have no idea what happened to me after yesterday afternoon. It's for your own good. Trust me. Not that you have any reason to.' She pushed the tears form her eyes and got up quickly as she saw he was getting out of the pool. Alice quickly ran and jumped the fence before he had a chance to get out and say something. No matter what it was she didn't want to hear it.

* * *

Home was not a place she could be anymore. She just couldn't go on pretending that it was her home. It wasn't even a house it was hell on earth. She had to get out of there and get Ben out too. But where could they possibly go?

She packed a backpack for herself and for Ben, took her box from under her bed that someone had obviously looked through, Jasper probably because the money wasn't missing. She also took another 2 thousand from under a loose floorboard and the card to her secret account. Alice had been planning this day, or night, however you look at it, for a long time. She had secret stashes of money everywhere, just in case something happened. All up she thought she should have about 20 grand saved up. This would be plenty to get her and Ben far away.

She made sure her mother was knocked out before she woke Ben up and snuck out of the house. Her first time escaping through the front door. She saw that Jasper's car had moved more onto the road and she thought she might have been able to see him sitting in it. Or it could just be her imagination. _Wishful thinking _the little voice told her. Alice shook her head to get rid of the ridiculous thought. Well if he was in it, her car would be out of the street before his had even started up.

"Hey Ben" she whispered "Be like a robber ok, real quiet and keep in the shadows" she told him just to be on the safe side. Alice sighed wondering how long she could actually look after her brother without any help, how long could she keep these games going?

Once out of the drive way and onto the road she looked back in the rear view mirror and saw Jasper standing there looking quite pathetic and beaten. She felt bad but knew he would get over it. He was leaving himself soon anyway.


	10. HELP THE STORY

**AN:**

**Ok guys obviously my muse for this story has left me, but I don't want it to end like this.**

**So I would like ur help…**

**What is Jasper going to do now?**

**Or **

**What is Alice and Ben going to do?**

**Plz help!**


	11. Chapter 10

_Jasper _

_7/12/08_

Jasper watched from his bedroom window as Alice and Ben snuck out of the house and drove away into the humid summer night. He didn't even think about trying to follow them, he knew his beat up car had no chance of keeping up with her if she didn't want him to. He wasn't even sure that he should go after her. She was quite capable of looking after her self, he knew that. But Ben was another issue. There was no question that he would be safe with Alice, but what was she going to do with him. She should have left by herself. As harsh as that sounded he knew she just wouldn't be able to handle becoming a full time mother to him, and that is what she would have to become. _But it's none of your business, _Jasper kept trying to tell him self, _it's her own life, her choice. _

Driving the next morning he kept telling him self that this was a bad idea. The last time he went over there…he didn't want to think about it. But Jasper didn't know where else to go, he had no idea where Alice was headed, he wouldn't even know where to begin looking. Instead Jasper was heading to the place that she was least likely to go, but where there would be people who might know. Jasper was trying to prepare himself for what might be a very difficult encounter. He was not succeeding.

Jasper sat in his car outside the house for 15 minutes before the blackout curtain at the front of the house shifted. He'd been spotted which meant he either had to get out and go up to the door, or leave. He would rather have left, but for some stupid reason he felt himself getting out of the car.

He hadn't even knocked on the door before it opened up and an unfriendly but un-surprised face appeared in the crack.

"Joseph?" it asked

"Jasper"

"Ah that's right"

They continued to just stare at each other waiting for the other to back down.

"So I guess u want something other then what people usually want when the come here"

"Probably" "ok that's it. Enough with the starring competition"

"Well why don't you just tell me what you want then"

"Fine." "Do you know where Alice is, or might be?"

"Still chasing her around eh?"

"No, not really. I just feel responsible, cause I'm the only one who knows"

"Knows what?"

"Just shit, never mind"

"Knows what? That she is one seriously fucked up girl? That her life is going to shit, and that her school decided to put her on a suicide watch?"

Jasper just looked at him, it sounded like he really cared for her.

"Yeah," he continued, "I know all about every thing. You go on about you're the only one who knows. Yeah well did you know that the suicide watch did nothing. That's right she tried it already. In my house. Twice. And where were you then? Having a little cry. You say you feel responsible, that's bullshit! Go back to your perfect little cubby hole of a life, and leave the real world to us."

Mike sighed, and went to close the door when Jasper pulled the door back open.

"Look, I know. I ran away, cause I couldn't deal with her life any more. I was a coward and just used that, incident as a way out. But I'm trying to fix that now. Please, help me find her."

Jasper had to put away all of his pride to admit everything, everything he was not even able to admit to himself let alone to Mike.

"I don't know where she is. I don't think she is anywhere at the moment. She called me about an hour ago, saying she was gone, and would ring me when she got there. But I don't know where that is."

"No idea?"

"Sorry no." "Although, she did have a list, she showed me one time. She said it was her contact list, her safe houses. If you found that you might be able to find her."

"I think I did find it, once. She probably took it with her though."

They both just stood there in silence not looking at each other.

"OK then. Can you give me a ring when she calls you?"

"I don't know man, we wont like that"

"Please"

"Maybe. Just give me your number."


	12. Chapter 11

_Mike _

_9/5/2006_

"Wow Alice!" Mike called out as she came through the front door "Your just in time for the best bit if my epic life!"

"Looks like I already missed that bit" she said motioning to all the empty bottles around the living room.

"You want something?" one of Mike's friends who was currently sitting in the kiddie pool filled with the rest of the alcohol offered.

"Nah man you know Alice don touch that shit"

"Give it to me"

Everyone stared at her like she had just grown another head.

"But Alice…?" Mike tried to make sense of what just happened, but his brain was too fried.

"Don't worry bout it Mike. Just give me the drink."

"Something happen?"

"You could say that". Mike knew better to try and delve into her life, so he just handed her the bottle.

"And…?" she looked at him expectantly, so he handed over his j as well.

She sighed in content, _wow, must have been real bad this time, _Mike thought to him self.

About an hour later and 15 minutes of searching Mike found Alice out by the pool with some guys that he never remembered inviting over. He usually wouldn't have cared, but these guys were trouble, at least their leader James didn't seem to be around.

"Alice!" he called to her, they all turned to look at him "iv been looking for you! I need you!"

"Hey buddy we need her first" one of the disgusting guys called back.

"I dun think so _buddy_" he pulled Alice away and saw that she was clutching a tequila bottle. She mustn't have had much because she was still walking, but she was really glassy eyed, and looked on the verge of passing out. He sighed in relief knowing he'd got to her just in time.

He got her back into the lounge room but she was acting really strange, she wouldn't sit down and kept looking around for something, or someone.

"Alice?" "Yo Alice snap out of it" it was like she couldn't hear him. _This is why heavy spirits and pot should not be mixed, especially by amateurs_. He laughed to him self, still not quite all there himself.

At some point he registered the unwanted guests going out the front door, so he could finally relax. Until he heard raised voices coming from the front yard, and Alice's name being mentioned. _Crap_ he thought. Cops were something he did not want being called in by the neighbours. So he headed out side followed by Alice, who was still being strange, and his mate Tyler.

"Alice!" was the first thing he heard when he got out side. It wasn't one of the morons, but some tall pretty boy. And he had said it with relief. _Ah this must be Jasper. _This Jasper fellow came over to where they were standing and tried to take Alice's hand,

"GET OFF ME!" she screamed.

"Alice, its me, Jasper"

"GO AWAY!" she was backing away from him now.

"What's wrong with you?"

"She just don't want you buddy" one of the jerks yelled out, they were heading over now.

"I said just go away" Alice whispered

"No" Jasper said defiantly

"Desperate much?" now the jerks were standing right behind Jasper, Mike could tell this was about to escalate, but didn't know what to do. Who to try and remove?

"Just fuck off ok?" Jasper spat at them, without turning around.

"Hey dude calm down" "Come on sweetie" they motioned to Alice, but she wasn't budging. Just stood there shaking her head. They didn't like this. Now they were being embarrassed. "I said come on" he reached out to grab her, but Jasper pushed his hand away. Now he turned to face them.

"Go. Away." He seethed.

"Or what?" "yeah that's what I thought" once more he went to grab Alice, But Jasper punched him. His nose started to gush blood. "What the fuck man!?" he spat, spraying blood that poured out of his crushed nose. Then his two mates moved in. One punched Jasper in the jaw before he had a chance to react, then Jasper sent him sprawling with a great swing at the guys stomach. The next guy was ready for Jasper's fist and dodged it easily before repeating Jaspers move, but not quite as well, so he followed it up with another one to Jasper's cheek. The other guy was up by this time and now they both had their sights on Jasper, who spat out of bit of blood onto the lawn. One punched him in the stomach, while the other kicked in the backs of his knees. Now that Jasper was on the ground they went into pummelling him with their feet, kicking his ribs, stomach, back and head while he tried to protect his face with his forearms.

"STOP!" Alice cried out. She had tears streaming down her face. And had been clutching onto Mikes sleeve. "STOP IT! STOP IT!" they paused mid strike to look at her. "I-I'm ready to leave now…leave him. L-lets go." she stammered. Obviously sobered up by the fight.

"Alice?" Mike warned her. She turned back to him and gave him a hug, "Look after Jasper" she whispered before leaving with the three guys.

When Mike looked down Jasper looked like shit. He was also unconscious by now. So Mike and Tyler carried him inside to wait for the ambulance.


	13. Chapter 12

**AN: ok guys big author note. Since my story jumps around quite a bit I thought I should give you a timeline of sorts, just so we are all on the same page. **

**The current year is 2008, December. Its going to be Alice's 18****th**** birthday in a few days. Jasper is 19. **

**When it jumps to 2006. Alice is 14, turning 15, jasper is 16. This is the year that Ben has the fight at school (chapter 2), and when Jasper has the fight at Mikes place (chapter 11). **

**It was 2005 when their father left. **

**I hope that helps. Cause even I was getting confused. **

**Be sure to always look at the date of the chapter. **

**Happy reading! **

**Please R&R! makes me write faster!**

**(p.s. I don't own twilight or anything affiliated with it) **

**Two short little chapters in one for this one: **

_Alice _

_8/12/08_

"Alice?" Bella's groggy voice answered her phone, "What time is it?"

"Just before 6am. I'm out front, come let us in" Alice whispered back into her phone.

"Us?" Bella questioned, but Alice was already hanging up. A minute later Bella was opening the front door, her eyes barely able to stay open.

"Hi Bella." She said sheepishly "sorry but this urgent…parents around?"

"Umm no. Phil's got a game this weekend"

"Awesome"

"Hi Ben" Bella said as Alice invited herself in.

"Is ahh, Edward around?"

"No."

"Just asking" Alice snickered, "that could have been awkward"

"Yeah yeah your so funny. You want some breakfast Ben?" he nodded and followed Bella out to the kitchen, Alice trailed behind.

"So what do I owe this early wake up call?"

"I just needed a place to get some contacts in order."

"What's happened Alice?"

"We left. For good."

"Oh Alice."

"Don't 'Oh Alice' me"

"Do you know what your doing?"

"Yeah, I do. Saving me and my brother"

"Where are you going to go? And what about money?"

"All taken care of. As long as I can borrow your computer for a bit?"

"Corse you can, but are you sure you've got all this thought through? What about Ben? He isn't the easiest of people to take care of? And if people go looking for you? When you don't turn up at school? It'll be like you've kidnapped Ben! Oh Alice!"

"Are you quite done Bella?"

"Yes…I think so"

"Like I said, I have everything under control. If your worried about being questioned, u silly girl, tell them everything you know"

"But you haven't told me anything"

"I know"

"Oh"

"Ok Bella. All done. Thanks."

"Are you're sure your fine? Don't need anything?"

"No Bella, Thanks for everything that you've already done" after a long hug good bye Alice and Ben headed back to the car "Oh and Bella? Try not to do anything too stupid"

_Bella_

_8/12/08_

"Emmett, you have to come here now…just come please"

Bella hung up the phone finally after frequently calling Edward and her brother Emmett. Each arriving soon after each other.

"Bella Stop. What exactly are you worried about?" Emmett asked her, while trying for the fifth time to get her to sit down before she fainted from hyperventilation.

"I'm just so worried about her. I'm sure there will be terrible consequences to her actions".

"But that is her problem Bella" Edward tried to comfort her "and like you said, you don't know anything about her plans."

"Yeah Bells. If your that worried, call her mum and say she stopped by here and now she's gone." They were all interrupted by a knocking at the door. Bella jumped up nervously thinking it was the police, followed closely by the two boys.

"Umm are you ahh, Bella?"

"Yes…and you are?"

"I'm Jasper, Alice's ah friend"


End file.
